Normally, I am very good at figuring out remote control buttons and adapting to finding them without having to look at the remote, my Adelphia DVR's remote is not Roger-friendly. The number buttons are too small and too close to each other.

I've been looking for some sort of replacement and the Harmony remotes from Logitech look cool enough. The remote can be connected to your computer so you can download configuration files that allow the remote to work with an ever changing list of audio/video products. Logitech is even selling one that will work with the new Xbox 360 gaming console.

My only problem is that at $200-$300, you really have to take care of the remote. And we all know how abused remote controls are. As meticulous as I am with my Palm TX or Apple iPod, my remote controls get fairly abused.

Black Friday Cometh

Beyond the first aisle, there be dragons.

That's borrowed from the quote on a plaque sold in a mail order catalog ("Beyond this place, there be dragons.") but it's pretty much a good observation of the people inside WalMart on the Friday after Thanksgiving, known as "Black Friday," the busiest shopping day of the year.

I did the early morning Black Friday thing once...once! I've sworn myself to never do that again. People are downright nasty on Black Friday.

So, if you are going to do battle with other shoppers on Black Friday, you can either take the Capital One barbarians with you or heed the tips at dollarhacker.com on how to survive Black Friday. Better than my suggestion of carrying a nice Glock 9mm semi-automatic with a couple of clips. Probably illegal in most states, definitely in San Francisco.

Two tips at the end of the list are important. Don't bring the kids. It will be crowded, lots of people running around and generally unpleasant for them. Also, be kind and flexible with the store staff. It's rough for them too and they are going to be dealing with a lot of nonsense. A smile goes a long way.

By the way, I just learned that quote, "Beyond this place there be dragons" was written at the ends of maps 500 or so years ago.

Know Your Name Elmo Hacked

Knows Your Name Elmo is the latest itteration of the Elmo doll released just in time for Christmas shopping. According to Endgadget.com, "Knows Your Name Elmo" is

a version of the furry red Sesame Street character that comes complete with a CD full of software and his very own USB cable. Program the $40 toy (which also comes in a Winnie the Pooh version) on your PC and it will sing, tell stories and remind your kid to eat his breakfast, all using the tyke’s own name (and just to make sure Madison and Jaxon are covered, there’s a database of 15,000 names available). We always thought that’s what parents were for, but it looks like the marketers at Fisher-Price know better, since they’re hoping to sell out of these this holiday season. We can only hope that at least a few will be bought by hackers, who will show us what Elmo and Pooh are really capable of.

Indeed, the first how-tos for helping those hackers has been posted.

Hmmm...so Elmo knows your kid's name, bedtime, birthday...maybe it should be renamed as Stalker Elmo.

Sorry Martha But You're Fired

Sorry Martha, but your show just isn't working for us.

NBC said it will not order another season of the Martha Stewart version of "The Apprentice."

NBC: Martha, what do you think went wrong?

Martha: My show is a good thing because it features Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia and...

NBC: So you're saying that's the problem? Answer my question.

Martha: It's Koppelman and his stupid cigar.

NBC: But you run the show, aren't you ultimately responsible?

Martha: I did my part. It's the other people. The house arrest didn't help and...

NBC:(chuckles) No, it didn't...

Martha: But Martha Stewart is a strong brand!

NBC: The ratings say otherwise.

Martha: What other executive can you get to replace me that has stronger recognition with the general public?

NBC: Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Jeff Bezos, Ken Lay

Martha: But I run MSLO!

NBC: I think we've heard enough, Martha, I'm sorry but you just don't fit in. Thank you.

The. Best. Christmas. Tree. Ever

Urban Outfitters has a replica "Charlie Brown Pathetic Christmas Tree."

Original

Replica

Order your's today!

Bottled Holidays 2005 Vintage

The Winter holidays are coming and several beer makers are coming out with their annual holiday batches. Not to be left out...errr...in the cold, Jones Soda has also has a special gift pack of unique flavored soda for the holidays

I first saw this at Target and took a double-take at the flavors and I'm sure you will too when you read further. The flavors? The nationally available package includes Brussels Sprout with Prosciutto, Cranberry Sauce, Turkey & Gravy, Wild Herb Stuffing, and Pumpkin Pie. The regionally available version (look at the Jones Soda website for details) has Broccoli Casserole, Smoked Salmon Paté , Turkey & Gravy, Corn on the Cob, and Pecan Pie.

Yummy.

Actually, I'm sure that instead of "yummy" the first word you thought of was "Why?" According to their website, "In an effort to provide more support for children’s charities, Jones launched two different holiday packs benefiting St. Jude’s Children’s Research Center and Toys for Tots, with the goal of raising $100,000 and $50,000, respectively.

J. Scott Wilson at WTAE in Pittsburgh did his own taste test. The best flavor he tasted? Cranberry.

If you want to try these sodas, hurry down to the stores. Wilson reported that his local Target is sold out and Jones said that once they are gone, they are gone. Maybe this will be the "It" item on eBay?

Semper Fidelis for 230 Years

The United States Marine Corp was founded on this date in 1775. Hoo-rah! 230 years old.

I just finished reading Jeff Shaara's book on the Great War, "To The Last Man," which focussed in part on Marines who fought on the Western Front. Through that book, because of a particular quote, I read more information on one of the most legendary Marines, Sergeant Major Daniel Daly.

During the Battle of Belleau Wood, one of the American Expeditionary Force's first actions during WWI, Daly and his men found themselves surrounded by Germans. Outgunned and outflanked, Daly figured the best way to save their butts was to order an assault, not unlike Joshua Chamberlain at Gettysburg.

Daly moved ahead and inspired his men to move forward wth him by yelling, "Come on, you sons of bitches! Do you want to live forever?" Daly and the other soldiers defeated the Germans and captured the town of Lucy le Bocage.

For his actions, Daly was awarded the Navy Cross. This was on top of the two Medals of Honor he received in the Boxer Rebellion and in Haiti. He probably should have received a third Medal of Honor for this action.

With the help of folks like Dan Daly, the Marine Corp will live forever.

Happy Birthday to the Corp! Hoo-rah!

Harry Potter Notes

Here are some FYI kinda things regarding the latest Harry Potter movie that will storm the country next weekend.

• It's rated PG-13. Not because of really scary stuff but because of some kissing. Yes, the kids are hitting puberty. New reports are saying it's because of some scary scenes. We'll find out on the 18th.
• 2.5 hours. That's how long the movie is. Be sure to sit at the end of the aisle for a fast bathroom break so as not to miss much.
• I'm definitely not going to the midnight showing. I also might avoid opening weekend unless my nieces and one nephew try to twist my arm. I want to see it but hate crowds (not a phobia). Maybe I could say they shouldn't be seeing any on-screen snogging yet.

Shack Attack

Radio Shack is now an authorized Apple reseller. Their stores will be stocking iPods in addition to the iPod accessories they already sell.

Hopefully, this also means they will be stocking Macs as well.

The one thing that can be said for Radio Shack is that unlike other electronics stores, the stuff they have on display are turned on and operational.

I went to Circuit City the other day to look at Palm PDAs and Windows Mobile PDAs. They had five on display. None were working (needed recharging) and the sales rep had no clue as to how to answer my question. Best Buy was no better.

I really, really, really wish we'd get a CompUSA here. There's no doubt they'd do well. The State College PA WalMart, in the North Atherton Mall, according to a manager I spoke with, is the most successful branch at the start of school. Probably because that Wal-Mart is Back To School central for many of the outlying towns in the area.

Since Lowe's is moving from their one location to a new one a quarter mile down the road, there's already a big-box store sized building waiting.

Butter Bust!

Sometimes, you just can't make this up. This from the Montreal Gazette.

Agriculture Department inspectors swooped down on four Wal-Mart stores in the Quebec City area yesterday and seized 72 plastic tubs of yellow Becel margarine with an estimated street value of $179.28.

The margarine is butter yellow, which makes it illegal for sale in Quebec.

The measure is intended to protect the province's 3,000 dairy producers.

The best part of the story was this,

On Thursday, Maxime Arseneau, agriculture critic for the Parti Quebecois, tabled a margarine tub in the National Assembly and charged that Unilever Canada Inc., which makes Becel, and Wal-Mart Stores Inc. Canada were conspiring to bring yellow margarine into the province.

"This is serious," Arseneau chided reporters who found the situation humorous.

Honestly, if I was a reporter there, I would probably have died laughing.

As one outsidethebeltway.com reader noted, "They didn’t take into account the street value after the margarine was cut with jelly."

So while Canadian law enforcement officers were chasing down and handcuffing margarine, other more serious crimes were not be tended to.

Movie Mumblings

Videogames and comic book heros rarely make for good movies. Exceptions have been Batman (Batman Begins definitely, others depends on which one), Spiderman, Superman (once you work with the idea that eyeglasses really do keep Clark Kent's identity secret). Super Mario Brothers, no. Doom could have been good. Tomb Raider? So-so.

Halo, the beyond popular videogame for the Xbox is being made into a movie. According to one guy who allegedly got a hold of the alleged script said it is excellent, and he doesn't play videogames.

Another sure sign this movie will do well is that Peter Jackson is producing. Speaking of Peter Jackson, his schedule is pretty much carved in stone for awhile. He is releasing King Kong in December, Halo is due in 2007, as is The Lovely Bones, based on the bestselling book.

I've read The Lovely Bones and figured it would be made into a movie. This should be a welcome break from all the special effects laden Lord of the Rings, King Kong and Halo. Maybe returnig to the style he used for "Heavenly Creatures."

Yet another comic book hero coming to the big screen. Marvel Comics' Nick Fury. Who is rumored to portray the action hero? Will Smith (Independence Day, Hitch).

Back in the day, I only read one or two Nick Fury comics but maybe Samuel L. Jackson, Laurence Fishburne would be better. Actually, I like the one suggestion at Cinematical.com, George Clooney. I wouldn't be surprised if his hairstyle was inspired by reading Nick Fury comics.

Chicken Cam

Koen Bogaert in Belgium has set up a webcam featuring his two chickens, Thelma and Louise. Why? Originally he just wanted to set up the webcam and see what happened. Then the whole Bird Flu thing started up and well, it really went from there.

"Since Europe is under the threat of the bird flu, Thelma & Louise became the symbol of the fight against the forced quarantine and massacre of domestic birds," he writes. "Newspapers, radio, and television are all bringing Thelma & Louise into the picture, and thousands of visitors are watching these funky chicks daily."

Burrito Wars

I can understand two guys fighting over a girl at a bar, a fight between neighbors over a dog that barks way too much but a fight over a burrito?

The Metropolitan Police Department is investigating an early-morning fight that supposedly started over a burrito.

Police said a man inside the store didn't have enough money to pay for his burrito and left the store to get more. While he was outside, another of the store's patrons decided to buy that burrito.

News4 talked to that patron, who didn't want to be identified. He said when the man came back into the store, he became livid that someone had bought his burrito and the fight escalated from there.

Police said the fight then spilled outside the store and at some point, the girlfriend of the original purchaser opened a car door and released a 75- to 80-pound pit bull, which bit three men, including an innocent bystander. SOURCE

As Outsidethebeltway.com observed: "If she released the hounds, I have to imagine it was carne asada and not just bean & cheese..."

Are 7-11 burritos that good?

The Death Star's Inner Workings

Imagine you're at the party and someone poses the question: "Hey, really, how does the Star Wars Deathstar work?" Well, howstuffworks.com has come to the rescue with their take on an answer to that question.

Personally, the most enlightening thing I've heard about Star Wars or Star Trek was when someone mentioned observing how you can tell where a particular episode was in the Star Trek season. Just watch Captain Kirk's belly. At the start of the season, William Shatner would be somewhat svelte. Toward the end of the season, the beer gut was starting. I suppose that catering truck on the production lot was just a little too tempting.

The WiFi Sweet Spot

Looking for a legal free wireless internet (WiFi) connection for your laptop, Smartphone or wireless enabled PDA? Wi-Fi-FreeSpot can help.

All the locations here in town are listed.

Mother Of All Mountain Dew

As far as soda goes (no, I don't call it "pop"), I'm a Coca Cola fan. In second place is Mountain Dew and that's because we had a Pepsi vending machine in our high school. It was a toss up between getting soda between classes or using the quarters to play Asteroids at the grocery store after school let out. The caffeine really helped my friends and I survive our classes after Noon. To me, Caffeine-Free Mountain Dew is sort of sacrilege.

Mountain Dew as been around nationally since the year I was born. (Wikipedia.com is a great source of information).

And now, the mother of all Mountain Dew flavors will be unleashed this month. Mountain Dew MDX. It is being billed as an energy soda, a hybrid of Mountain Dew and an energy drink like Red Bull, but tasting a whole lot better. Oh yeah, and there's more caffeine.

In other words, this may be the jet fuel I need some mornings since I don't drink coffee. Recently though, I've tried Energy Orange from Jones Soda Co. but it doesn't do anything for me.

Banned in Connecticut!

Slashfood.com reported that Seriously Bad Elf Ale has been banned in Connecticut!

According to the website for the Seriously Bad Elf Ale importers, Shelton Brothers,

Connecticut regulations prohibit the use of images of Santa Claus, children or children's toys, the Easter Bunny, and even dear old Mom, on beer labels because they could appeal to youngsters, who, in Connecticut, it seems, routinely cruise the aisles of their local liquor store for appealing packaging. These fiendishly precocious children then purchase the products, or convince their unsuspecting parents to purchase them and leave them unattended.
The wayward youths, investigators believe, then spirit the bottles to their rooms for consumption, typically ignoring the brewers' recommendations for proper serving temperature, glassware, and food pairings.

Yep, some Connecticut lawmakers actually got paid for pushing this silly legislation through. I guess the current laws against underaged drinking weren't discouraging the kids or the people buying the kids beer. Maybe they should do some public service announcements announcing that if your kids drink Seriously Bad Elf Ale, they'll end up on Santa's Seriously Bad Kids list.

Then there's Very Bad Elf Ale. It's a darker, bolder ale.

Bad elf! Bad! Go sit on the time-out chair!

Lock Down The Wireless

I've been tinkering with wireless connectivity on a new Palm TX and a loaner Siemens SX66 Windows Mobile 2003 PDA.

I've found the PDA (Personal Digital Assistant) functions work just fine on the SX66 without having the cell phone (Cingular) portion turned on. This is fine because the SX66 is a loaner from Cingular to my friend.

I provide computer support for the dean in the College of Arts and Architecture at Penn State. He purchased a Treo 650 PDA cell phone with the idea that he could leave his laptop behind while traveling. The Treo uses the Palm OS and I've been working with Palm PDAs pretty much since 1996. Even so, the Treo 650 is a slightly different beast and we ran into some major issues with it, mainly that our network calendar would not synchronize between the Mac and the Treo.

Before I found a solution for the Treo 650, I started looking at how well a Windows Mobile PDA can connect with a Mac and borrowed the SX66. This then led into looking at wireless connectivity, as opposed to a cell phone connection to the internet and then an evaluation of the new Palm TX with built-in wireless support.

Both PDAs offer built-in 802.11b wireless internet connectivity. The faster wireless protocols would be nice but a battery drain. The coolness with a wireless PDA is that things really open up in terms of personal computing.

Imagine driving around all day taking care of errands. For relief, you walk into the local Starbucks and load up on some espresso latte thingamajigger concoction (can you tell I don't drink coffee?) and sit down to enjoy whatever CD is spinning on the PA system. Just pull out the Palm or Pocket PC (as the hardware end of the Windows Mobile stuff is called), turn on WiFi and connect with Starbucks' wireless internet. From there, you can grab email, send a message to someone check college football BCS standings or log on to AOL Instant Messenger.

The world is your oyster.

Wireless internet is becoming more prevalent. Hotel lobbies have wireless internet in addition to Ethernet jacks in the rooms (kiss telephone access and worries goodbye!). McDonald's has wireless in some locations (buy a Big Mac, get access).

Locally, I can get free wireless internet access at Wegman's Grocery Store (they have a nice café, Denny's, the Honda dealership, Barnes & Noble and a couple other cafés.

I installed a program on the Palm TX called NetChaser. It is designed to continuously scan for wireless networks as one walks or drives down the road When it finds a network, it will log its name and information (the name and whether or not it is locked from anonymous log ons).

On the way home from the grocery store last night, I turned NetChaser on and drove the two or so miles to my house. As I drove through the neighborhood, NetChaser picked up well over 15 different wireless networks. To make matters worse, all but five or so of the listed networks allowed for anonymous connections.

This means I could stand outside someone's home and use their internet connection with my wireless Palm PDA, Windows Mobile PDA or laptop, gratis. Of course, this is very much against the law. The courts here in the United States pretty much treat that as illegal trespass and there have been convictions.

Aside from legality, we should all be working to keep the hackers and snoops out of home computer networks.

My own wireless setup is far more secure. I don't broadcast my network name (known as SSID), require a password to connect and only allow computers with certain IDs (known as MAC address) to connect to my network. All is not perfect though, I really need to get a new router that allows for a certain type of encrypted password.

So my advice to you, ensure your wireless network is locked down. Don't worry Mom and Dad, I definitely locked down your wireless router.

In the meantime, I'm going to enjoy a nice Saturday afternoon at Wegman's with some hot tea, a good book (currently reading "To the Last Man" by Jeff Shaara) and occasionally logging onto the internet to check email, without my PowerBook. The world is my oyster (I've said it before, this is a favorite saying these days).

Battle, Not

Some senators and members of the press are predicting a huge battle over Judge Alito's nomintion to replace Sandra Day O'Connor on the Supreme Court of the United States.

It hasn't happened yet and based on what some senators are saying in their press conferences, it looks like Alito will be on the Court.

News media sensationalism has really hit an all time high and the blame should go to the creation of 24/7/365 news channels. A small airplane wreck in a small town makes it to the nationally broadcast news these days. Gotta fill those 24 hours with something. Soon you'll see an in-depth investigative report on teenagers battling their principals over what they can wear to school.

"He like said like that you know I couldn't wear this cute tight short pants to school. It's like you know from like Abercrombie and like Fitch you know. Omigod I need to like channel with my homeys."

"Talking points: Godless children dressing like hookers in our schools and what we need to do about it!"

Penn State: Winning Ugly

Back in 1983, the Chicago White Sox were having a successful year but the stats really didn't show it. They were winning through "scrappy play" (that's how Wikipedia.com termed it). This scrappy play was explained as "Winning Ugly."

Winning ugly pretty much describes Penn State football's 8 wins and 1 loss thus far this season. One game, the defense will shut down the other team, maybe that game or another, the offense will really shine.

Michael Robinson, the first string quarterback, is dangerously inconsistant. I say this because they take on Wisconsin this Saturday in what may be the showdown for top of the heap in the Big Ten conference. He can execute the play but from there but his long throws don't always connect, his short tosses are OK and the running plays work well enough, especially when he's running the ball himself.

Penn State has the potential to win this last home game of the season but...but...